This Is My Life?
by Method-2-My-Madness
Summary: Relationship after failed relationship. A mistake with a friend seems to be the thing that offsets his love life. Written for HPFC Ring Around the Boyfriend.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. Any recognizable characters are not mine.

**A/N: **This was made for the 'Ring Around the Boyfriend' challenge.

**Couple: **Harry/Hermione

**Prompt: **Sister

Harry would be the first to admit that he wasn't very good at the relationship area of his life. First there was Cho. Who seemed to cry whenever Harry was around her. He was pretty sure the only reason she had been around him 5th year was because he had been the last one to see Cedric alive. And the weepy kiss the two had shared in the Room of Requirement did nothing for his self esteem. Sixth year brought his feelings for Ginny. After being jealous of Dean's relationship with Ginny for most of the year and trying to figure out his feelings he had finally started dating his best friends little sister. That relationship was much better then the thing he had with Cho, but it only lasted a little less than a month before he had to break it off for her safety. Spending his 7th year on the run, ending with the defeat of Voldemort, had forced Harry to mature much more than the average 17 year old. And now that he had returned to Hogwarts to redo his last year and he was free to pursue the relationship with Ginny he had prematurely ended...he didn't want her. And, continuing his horrible relationship track record, the one he did want was out of reach.

Hermione Jane Granger. His best friend. The girl who had stood beside him and been like the sister he had never had for 7 years. Never before had he had a lusty thought of the girl. But now it seemed his mind had decided to betray him. Supplying inappropriate thoughts and images at inopportune moments. And unfortunately his traitorous body would respond. So now he could barely be near Hermione without the evidence of his attraction showing itself. No matter where the three of them hung out Hermione managed to do something to peak his interest. Brushing her hair behind her revealed the elegant curve of her neck. Twisting certain ways showed off the figure he had never noticed before. Innocent touches he had never thought twice about were now off limits to him.

He could tell it was hurting the girl. The hurt flashed through her chocolate eyes whenever he jerked away from her. He wished he could tell her why he did it. Tell her he didn't see her as a sister, but as a possible partner. But he couldn't bring himself to do it. She was with Ron. They were happy together and he wouldn't do anything to ruin her relationship with Ron or himself. And this was the reason he was currently in the Room of Requirement, sitting in front of a fireplace and downing a bottle of firewhiskey. He'd disappeared just after lunch and wasn't sure quite what time it was. If it got too late he was sure someone would come looking for him. Leaning back on the couch he closed his eyes and took a swig from the half empty bottle in his hand, eyes shutting. He hung half way between sleep and consciousness when he heard the door open and felt someone sit on the edge of the couch next to him. A familiar hand on his arm caused his to jerk awake and his bleary eyes opened, lids heavy with liquor. Dark green orbs locked on the figure next to him, bushy brown hair looking like a halo with the fire as a backdrop. A goofy smile spread across his face and, for the first time in months, he initiated contact with his best friend. Taking her small hand in his.

"Hiiiiiiiiiii, 'Mione."

"Harry." His name was a reprimand, the disapproval easily detected in her tone. "Why have you been drinking?"

The intoxicated boys only answer was to burst into giggles and swing around the bottle clenched in his free hand around his head before taking another deep tug of the bottle. Hermione shook her head and stared into the fire.

"'M not drinkin' Miny. Want some?"

Harry offered the bottle and despite herself, the corners of Hermiones mouth twitched upwards. She didn't approve of his indulging with alcohol, especially on a school night, but she did have to admit he was adorable like this. He was so relaxed right now and she hadn't seen him so care free since first year. Hermione simply rolled her eyes and took the bottle from her friends hand, placing it on the table the room had supplied. Standing up she grabbed both of Harry's hands, pulling on them and trying to heave the limp body off the couch.

"Come on Harry! It's almost curfew and we have school tomorrow so I have to get you to the dorms."

One last big tug and the inebriated boy was lifted from the couch. Unfortunatly Hermione wasn't expecting for him to have virtually no control of his body, and wound up with an armful of Harry. She stared down at him in shock, not moving as his arms wrapped around her shoulders. That was no big deal as it seemed like his legs weren't going to support him. At least it wasn't a big deal, until he lifted himself to plant his lips against hers. Her mouth dropped in shock, allowing Harry's tongue to slip in aside hers, the flavor of firewhiskey bursting along her taste buds. Reality slammed into her and she shoved Harry away from her, backing up with hand lying protectively across her mouth. She stared through wide eyes at Harry, watching him readjust himself on the couch where he had fallen. Silence reigned in the room, only broken by the soft crackling of the fire. Taking a shaky breath Hermione shook her head and stalked out of the room, softly closing the door behind her.

Harry watched her leave through blurred eyes, leaning back on the couch and swiping the bottle up, downing the rest of it in one fell swoop. Shutting his eyes he tilted his head back with a sigh. So much for not ruining their relationship.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. Any recognizable characters are not mine.

**A/N: **This was made for the 'Ring Around the Boyfriend' challenge.

**Couple: **Harry/Pansy

**Prompt: **Hold

Three weeks. It had been three weeks and things still had not smoothed out between Hermione and himself. They had barely spoken to each other since that night in the Room of Requirement and not only did it cause a riff between the two of them, but their tension had hooked Ron into their mess. So now Harry felt at odds with the two people closest to him. For nearly a month there had been near silence when the three of them were around each other. No more easy jokes flew between them. No familiar touches or comfortable pauses. Just thick, oppressive, cut-it-with-a-cleaver silences. The one happening _now_, would be a good example.

The 'Golden Trio' sat in the Gryffindor common room studying. Or trying to at least. Ron and Hermione sat on the couch while Harry positioned himself in an armchair. Separate from the other two. The only noise between them the sound of their quills scratching on parchment. Harry sighed. This wasn't working. The words on the page in front of him kept shifting around and rearranging themselves. He'd been reading the same paragraph for the last hour and he had _no _idea what it said. Sighing again he closed his book and stood, mumbling some half-assed excuse before heading for the portrait. It was a testament to how bad things were that Ron didn't ask where he was heading and Hermione didn't start lecturing about how it was to close to curfew to be going out.

He walked the practically deserted halls mindlessly, ignoring the portraits that were beginning to fall asleep. The Zombie like state he had fallen into was broken by what sounded like a small whimper. Blinking in confusion he looked around for the source of the noise. Some how he had ended up on the third floor. In the same corridor that had been off limits his first year. Sighing he decided to head back to the common room, lest he be caught out of bed. Turning the way he came he was once again stopped by a whimpering noise.

Cursing his curiosity he walked toward the noise, cracking open the same door he had all those years ago. Except this time he wasn't confronted with a snarling, drooling three headed dog. The only thing the room contained now was a sad, crying Slytherin. He wanted to close the door. To just ignore what he was seeing. But his conscious wouldn't allow him to. Chewing on his lower lip, a nervous habit, he quietly stepped into the room and closed the heavy door. The bang of the door echoed in the room and the crying girls head snapped up, revealing the face of Pansy Parkinson. A scowl immediately spread across her face and she wiped fruitlessly at her tears.

"What do you want Potter?" She spat out his name, trying to sound intimidating but failing due to the tears still running down her face. Harry just shrugged, not in the mood for fighting, and stepped closer to the girl who he was supposed to despise. A wand was suddenly pointed in his face but he made no move to draw his own. Grabbing the hand that was gripping the wand nervously he easily turned it away from him and stepped closer to Pansy, simply pulling her into a hug. This was certainly not his normal protocol for dealing with the snake house, but he had seen the pain and sadness in her eyes, and if it could make the tough Slytherin Princess cry all alone in an abandoned room then it had to be pretty bad.

"W-what are you doing? Let me go you big Gryffindor galute!" Pansy struggled to get out of the hug but Harry just held on tighter, making shushing sounds and murmuring soft comforts into her hair. The struggles didn't last long, and soon Harry had an armful of crying girl. Her small hands clutched the back of his robes and her tears soaked his chest but he didn't care. He knew the pain in her eyes quite well. He'd seen it in his own when he looked in the mirror. While he wanted comfort no one gave it to him. But he could do for this girl what wasn't done for him. He lowered the both of the to the floor and just sat there for he didn't know how long, softly shushing her every now and then. Soon her sobs turned to quiet tears and eventually she sat up, no longer crying and wiping the tears from her cheeks. She refused to look at Harry and he realized that she was embarrassed, something he didn't think was possible. He was considering getting up and leaving the room, who knew how late it was now, before she spoke. Her soft voice echoing in the silence.

"Why?"

Harry just shrugged, sticking his hands in his pockets and looking away.

"You just looked like you could use a hug is all." 

"But you're the Gryffindor golden boy. Why should you care about what's wrong with a evil little Slytherin?"

"Call it my hero-complex. I couldn't just leave you in a dark room to cry."

Pansy didn't say anything, standing up and walking towards the door. She paused when she was standing next to him and a soft hand slipped into his, gently squeezing it. He looked at her in surprise, staring into her bright brown eyes. A small smile crossed her lips, and Harry couldn't help the thought that she was a lot prettier when she wasn't smirking or scowling.

"Thank you Harry. I appreciate what you did. But if you ever tell anyone what just happened I will deny it and then curse you. Understand?"

Huffing a laugh Harry nodded, returning her smile. "The last however long is a complete blur Pansy. Can't remember a thing."

Nodding in acceptance she gave one last smile before opening the door and disappearing down the hall. Glancing around the empty room Harry sighed before following Pansy's example, heading back to his common room.


End file.
